Un-named divine client sues Westboro Baptist Church: Lawyers

An “un-named divine client” has filed a slander suit against the controversial Westboro Baptist Church and its pastor, Fred Phelps, according to a press release issued today from the law firm, Preachit Brothers, LLP.

“Our client prefers to remain anonymous at this point,” the press release reads. “Suffice it to say that he created the universe and all that is within it.”

According to the release, Preachit Brothers’ client has suffered “undue hardship due to mispresentation on the part of the [Westboro Baptist] Church and Mr. Phelps.”

Fred Phelps could not be reached for comment. However, an inside source, speaking on the condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to speak to the press, said, “We don’t really know who exactly is suing us. Some people think it’s God, but God hates everybody equally. Why would he single us out.”

Preachit Brothers spokesperson, Amen Preachit, did have this to say about their mystery client: “Wesboro Baptist Church has publicly misrepresented our client on numerous occasions. For example they consistently present our client as having a less than favourable disposition to Semitic peoples. This is in fact quite contrary to the case. In fact our client has numerous Jewish family members.”

Damages sought were not identied in the press release, but it did note that “fire and brimstone figure significantly in the requested restitution.”

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